Following your dreams or letting time go by

Being able to do pretty much whatever you want with your life is the dream. It's what I've wanted my whole life. And I'm so happy that I've finally made it and I wouldn't want this any other way. But my whole life I've had this idea, that when this time came, I'd have everything under control. I'd know exactly what I wanted to do with my life and how I'd spend my time. And now... Well now I'm lost. There are so many possibilities! But what dream do I follow? And am I even brave enough to go on these adventures? 

Every since I was little, I've dreamed about travelling with a circus. I've dreamed about being homeless, just travelling around with absolutely nothing but my dog and the few things I've needed. I've dreamed about living in an old castle, on a boat and in a tree. And I can assure you that I haven't let go of those dreams, but all of the sudden, they are actually possible and sound so... Scary. It's a huge world out there, and having to take care of myself, just me against the world, that sure as hell is something that makes me wish I had other dreams. Why couldn't I have dreamed of finding the love of my life or owning my own store? Though, I guess I would have been scared anyways if those actually were my dreams.
I know you have to get out of your comfort- zone before you can life your life to the fullest. I know you have to take chances and dare to do the things you've always feared. But how does one even begin? I'm not the shy type, but I'm certainly not the brave one either, not in this situation.
At least I know that I'm not alone. Thousands, hell..  Millions of people are feeling this way and it's probably not going to disappear into thin air as my life goes by. Maybe it's something you'll get used to? Or maybe it's just something you'll learn to life with. Hopefully it's something you'll become better at handling. Otherwise this whole "life"-thing that's ahead of me, is going to be very freaking difficult... But I guess i already knew I'd be.
You see, I know what I have to do. I've always known. I just want to delay it, just a bit more, because I know it'll be one of the most difficult things I've done in my life. And I know I'll have to just jump into it.. Maybe I will soon. But which dream do I dare to follow? All of them? Because that's going to take a while. But maybe that's what all the years ahead of me are there for. To make sure I reach every single one of those dreams.
Maybe I should get started before it's too late. 

You know what they say: "Es zinu mirkļus dienas garumā un dienas mirkļa īsumā." 

- I've got no idea what it means, but it's something about how time goes by, I'm not going to waste my time trying to translate it. 

Well would you look at that! Another post. I'm just that quick at writing them :3

When you lose something you can't replace

Today I lost someone I cared about. And for the first time, I've lost someone at a point in my life, where I'm really able to think about life and death... 

It's a strange thing, having to realize that we all have to die at some point, and that we'll lose the people we love. My parents seem so fine with the whole situation. Of course they're mourning, but they keep telling me that "He's in peace now" and "He was old, this is the way it's supposed to be". And it makes me think... Are all these things just something we say to make ourselves feel better? Or do we actually grow up, and commit to the fact that death is okay?

At this point I know that we all have to die and that it's the way things should be. But I find it so very, very hard to accept. And I wonder if we'll ever get to a point, where we're okay with the fact that we'll die? Two days ago my step- grandad (Who was named Aksel) had told my step dad, that he was afraid. He was afraid to die, at age 87. That scares me. I don't want to be afraid of dying when I know there's no way around it. But of course, he was an atheist. It's a scary thought to die and then just... Be nothing. And I'm not gonna lie, when they told me he was dead today, I questioned my own belief for a moment of whether or not we get reincarnated after death. But I like to believe that we do, and when we're ready for another adventure, we'll get another body. Another life. And I hope that it's the truth. It'll make all of this easier for me and it would be lovely to think that Aksel's soul is out there, somewhere, in peace and wondering why he was so afraid of something so wonderful and beautiful.

I truly hope, that I'll be able to understand this whole life and death-thing that's going on. But for now, I guess I'll give myself some time to mourn and try not to be afraid. Then I can go on with living my life. Just like we're all supposed to..

Just a small town girl..

"Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world

Took the midnight train going anywhere"...

... And the train went straight to Copenhagen, the capital of Denmark.

As someone being used to the silent sound of the fields and forests and someone who've always lived in small towns, close to nature and separated from the stressful people of the city, it can be very overwhelming to visit a city like Copenhagen. 

The first thing you notice is the energetic noise from thousand cars, crying children, people buzzing and bikes squeaking. Not long after, you'll realize how impossible it is to walk in the streets. Not only because of the immense size of the city, but also because of the countless number of people trying to get to their destination. 
And yet, something about the city intrigues me.. 

I'm beginning to understand why people think the danish people are the happiest. 
I went on a canal tour excursion and being in a boat, made it possible for me to relax and enjoy the life of the city. I was surprised to see these "city people's" smiles. Everyone waving and smiling at me, children playing, people drinking beers and cheering. People yelling after the boat "Y'all look amazing today!". 

I'm still just a small town girl, but I'm amazed by the life of the city and the constant adventure the city brings you. But for now, I'm most comfortable when I'm able to view it all from afar. Maybe in the future I'll be brave enough to join some of the adventures.

- Still, it sure is good to be home again.

The difficulties of starting a blog

When I, about a week ago, began exploring the world of the bloggers after my friends had told me about it, I thought I'd start a blog right away. But it wouldn't be that easy..

The thought of starting a blog brings a few difficulties, well at least in my case it did. 

I knew that I wanted to blog about my passion for fashion, but unfortunately I also have a huge passion for plants. And one of my plants is in this very moment, working on reaching the ceiling in my room. And it sure can't do this, without my camera stand!

As you can see, this makes it difficult for me to photograph any outfits.

It might seem very easy to start a blog for you, but for a newbie like me, I had absolutely no idea how to make a blog! But I was lucky I had my blogger-friends to help me out and after a couple of days I finally made it work! 

Now that I had started the blog and I (kinda) knew how things worked, I began writing. And I've just come to realize that I have no idea how to blog. But I guess I'll learn after reading some more posts.. 

"The secret of getting ahead is getting started." - Mark Twain

So here I go.